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Now Watching: G.I. Joe: Retaliation (7/14)

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Post by Krubixcube Sun Jul 14, 2013 9:58 pm

GI: Joe huh? I knew this was inevitable. I think you made this club so you could get us to watch it in a more formal way. =p

That said, I'm kind of excited in a "this movie will be ridiculous" kind of way.
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Post by Krubixcube Mon Jul 15, 2013 8:00 am

Man...that was like a masterclass of shitty filmmaking. I don't know why you liked it so much, like it was just bad. It wasn't so bad it was good, it was just...bad. The dialogue especially, it was like each character was seeing different things. There were like...5 different conflicts happening all in different rooms as well. It was like a 13 year old wrote the script (or several different 13 year olds who couldn't agree on what movie to make).

Why, spiddy, why?
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Post by Krubixcube Tue Jul 16, 2013 3:03 am

Well, let's see what genres people are into and then I'll throw up a poll. That said, just for fun, let's list all of the things wrong with this movie in broad strokes. Since you love it so much, I'll let you take point.

Or rather, PSPIDDY, please defend yourself as to why you think people should watch this piece of shit movie.
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Post by Krubixcube Tue Jul 16, 2013 6:39 am

It is certainly a laundry list of current movie problems that is for sure. Though other movies perpetrate the same crimes GI Joe does it to great lenghts:

- Dialogue that is inconsequential to both character development and plot (it's not explosions so who cares right?)

- Villains that seem to exist in completely different places than the heroes, and yet we're supposed to feel that stakes are raised when they do anything. And on a similar note, villains that don't interact with the heroes outside of fight scenes (because again, who cares, right?)

- Too many story threads

- Technical Jargon (that was actually one of my laugh out loud moments of the movie when she talks about cyberblasting things and masking IP addresses).

- Small hints of romance that go nowhere or comes out of no where (the former in this case)
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Post by avidacridjam Sun Aug 04, 2013 1:30 am

Watching this right now. I wondered how long it would take me to laugh unintentionally. All it took was 2 seconds of the RZA. Beautiful.
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Post by avidacridjam Sun Aug 04, 2013 2:46 am

It's so damn ridiculous, every inch of it. I had a good time.

Just the sight of RZA made me laugh. The first G.I. Joe film made me laugh in the same way when Cobra Commander takes off his mask to reveal that he's Joseph Gordon-Levitt.

Destro got the shaft. I wonder why.
Zartan killed Snake and Storm's master? Really?

Oh, and to all of those goobers who cried foul when a portion of Metropolis (a fictional city) got decimated in Man of Steel: where the fuck where you assholes when the entirety of England was destroyed in this movie?
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